Whenever I am writing, there is an ‘I don’t know what I’m doing’ about it. I have never fully felt in control with whats coming from my head to my fingers etc. It is strange because I began to believe I had no idea what I am talking about, and maybe that is what made me carry on writing. As you keep doing something, things refine themselves, and you become more aware of what is successful or not. It is these successes that help you become a ‘master’ of your chosen activity. Relating back to the uncontrollable nature of our thoughts and how to rationalise them, or to not, is that you can become anything you want, anything you have an interest for and people will not pay you for it for a long time, but that does not matter. You will keep doing this ‘thing’ and you’ll make time to do it. One day this ‘thing’ will perpetuate and become more integral to your daily pattern and people will take note and be intrigued. Once you then wrap it up in nice stuff to make it presentable people then take it serious and then this ‘thing’ has turned into something rather spectacular and completely useful. People will want a piece of it, and will want their own version of it so much so they will keep your living going to keep getting this ‘thing’. By the time you know it, this ‘thing’ has become your proffession and any worries of finding a job you love go out the window because your profession is right on your lap. And all you had to do was put your head down until you look up and say, woah look what happened.
To gather back to this feeling of control, whenever we walk into uncharted territory we are always wobbly. We do not know anything about it, but we learn and learn quickly. At the point of seizing control, not too much though, we can define what we would like to achieve from this ‘thing’ we love to do so much.